decision making

Effective Coaching and Mentoring

Requirements for Effective Coaching and Mentoring

Effective  Coaching and Mentoring approaches are effective development methods that reap reward for many.

There is a difference between the two and this can be confusing to some, but it is important to establish the difference before commencing and coaching and/or mentoring relationship.

There are a variety of interpretations of both and although subjective, I believe coaching to be shorter term and task focused – where the transfer of knowledge is extracted from the coachee through a series of effective questioning from the coach.

Question

Can I coach someone to play the piano if I can’t play the piano myself?

Yes, providing the coachee has experience of playing the piano in the first instance, where I can use effective questioning techniques to extract their knowledge. If they are a beginner or don’t have awareness/experience of playing the piano then the answer must be ‘no’.

Can I mentor someone to play the piano?

This has to be ‘no’ because the transfer and sharing of knowledge comes from the mentor to the mentee.

As I’m not able to play the piano, I have little or no knowledge to share. So where can I mentor? I can mentor where I have experience and understanding with the subject/topic which the mentee is looking to improve upon.

But effective coaching and mentoring goes beyond the ability and knowledge of the coach/mentor.

There are core elements and traits that are required by the coach/coachee or Mentor/mentee.

The fundamental areas include the relationship match between the two people. Are their values aligned? If there is common ground this helps, but more importantly their values need to be aligned or at least not a contraction to each other. If values contradict, this can affect trust and lead to frustrations between the two.

I had recently entered a Mentoring relationship.

It should of been a success.

We work in the same industry and I, as the mentor, have the required skill set and experience to support the growth of the mentee, however the values and behaviours weren’t aligned. This lead to ineffectiveness in the relationship, damaging trust, and from my part, the enthusiasm to inspire. The mentee behaved in a manner that wasn’t aligned to my own values, one example being they were too direct and would play for position in front of an audience. When feedback took place, the mentee countered each discussion and feedback point with their own justification for their actions. I questioned why the mentee who desired career progression, with the help of an identified and recommended mentor, would question so much feedback and not listen. It was a challenging situation which I believe it was acceptable to walk away from, rather than pursue our differences. I felt the mentee wasn’t for changing their behaviour demonstrated other frustrations, which they were seeking justification and support for their own actions.

With a growth mindset, it is important to retain awareness that not everyone can be coached or mentored. It is acceptable for either party to terminate the relationship and not exhaust either yourself or the coachee/mentee. However, when the values are aligned and a trusting relationship is apparent then the possibilities are endless and worth pursuing.

Share:

Facebook
LinkedIn
read on

Related Posts

ideas for life

Ideas for life – no more resolutions

Why most of us fail? If you are in the incredible 20% of people who hit their resolutions every year, congratulations! You are a rare breed 🙌🥳👏 For the rest of us, it is mostly a journey downwards into a spiral of failure, guilt, and frustration which circles back to thinking less of ourselves and hardly ever making us feel good or achieve anything meaningful. Most of us fail for three main reasons: Lack of clarity, Unreasonable expectations, and Lack of inspiration or passion.

employee wellbeing

Employee Wellbeing

The link between employee wellbeing and productivity is well established but, as we move into the post-pandemic phase, it will be harder than ever for managers to keep the two in harmony.

Stress management strategies using EI

Stress management strategies using EI

Have authentic, emotionally intelligent relationships with people. Associate with those whose company you enjoy and who support you. Authenticity requires self-awareness and emotional expression so that when in conversation with an individual you are able to share your feelings openly, including any distractions impairing your ability to concentrate on them.

stress factors

Stress factors and coping techniques

How can we avoid distress?

We cannot. However, we can learn techniques to keep distress to a minimum by increasing our coping strategies. We can also use eustress appropriately in our occupations to improve our performance and inspire others.

Browse our courses
cmi logo
OTHM Qualifications Logo

High impact, virtual micro-learning for maximum output. All programmes are £100 and can be toped up to a full CMI Level 5 Qualification.

For all levels of managers, fully accredited qualifications to supercharge careers and earning power.

Aimed at leaders managing projects, although the qualification is also open to learners wishing to build on their general management skills.

For all types of consultants, either wishing to enter the field or already working and looking to develop into strategic roles.

For all types of leaders looking to develop their leadership and communications skills, and nurture and build effective and functional teams. 

Browse our courses

High impact, virtual micro-learning for maximum output. All programmes are £100 and can be toped up to a full CMI Level 5 Qualification.

For all levels of managers, fully accredited qualifications to supercharge careers and earning power.

Aimed at leaders managing projects, although the qualification is also open to learners wishing to build on their general management skills.

For all types of consultants, either wishing to enter the field or already working and looking to develop into strategic roles.

For all types of leaders looking to develop their leadership and communications skills, and nurture and build effective and functional teams.